I and a fellow endocrine sufferer, who I appreciate very much, shares her common experiences with hormonal health challenges and size acceptance. We agree on much. [My questions in blue] Read on:
1. DESCRIBE YOUR EXPERIENCE WITH SIZE ACCEPTANCE, WHAT DID YOU FIND POSITIVE ABOUT IT, WHAT DID YOU FIND NEGATIVE?
I originally joined the size acceptance movement in 1996. After purchasing my first personal computer and joining the citizens of the internet from home, I stumbled across the Dimensions Magazine website that broadcast the statement: Where Big is Beautiful. The print magazine articles were written by men and women who took pride in themselves as a whole person. This was a new discovery for me, having been a fat teenager and dealing with discrimination, bullies, and general bias because of my size.
I spent a few years mostly reading and studying materials from the NAAFA and Dimensions Magazine, and researching the phenomenon that is fat acceptance.
Over time, I began to learn that for me, the journey to "Size Acceptance" is really a journey of "Self Acceptance" rather than coming to terms with being just fat. As a person, I learned from the SA movement that I have a right to enjoy life just as I am. Since that time, I've even been able to help friends of all sizes come to terms with their own bodies. It's been an interesting journey. When I tell women with low self esteem that I love my body and who I am-- they begin to wonder how "I" could love myself, when they see me as socially unacceptable!
Things I learned from SA:
Doctors usually believe you're fat because you're lazy. Little research and questioning is done for fat people. Diet and exercise are the common prescriptions. Many fat people then turn to alternative medicine or "acceptance" of themselves and then fail to get help! Fat and sexuality are not mutually exclusive. Many people can and so see through the fog of the myth that fat people are somehow second-rate.
My opinions matter, no matter how fat I am! The anonymity of the SA movement online has helped many fat people find their confidence and ability to speak in regards to various issues. I think this has helped the most in fat people learning to advocate for themselves. They know they're not alone, and can voice their opinions.
Society still has yet to accept fat people as the norm in America. Theater seats are uncomfortable, airplane seats and being asked to purchase two seats is the norm. Bathroom stalls are too small. Stairs are too steep. Booths at restaurants are made with fixed tables. Hospital gowns for fat patients are hard to find (and you're made to feel like a freak if you ask for a larger gown at times). Chairs at airports and doctor's office have arms that can cause physical harm to a fat person.
There's a bias in America that fat people are nonsexual. That's so far from the truth! We are human beings just like everyone else, and we have carnal desires, wants and needs to be loved, feel affection and physical attraction. The lies that are perpetuated by the media don't help any.
Size Acceptance has its own militant activists just like every other agenda.
I am still a member of the SA movement, but left my formal advocacy agenda in late 2008.
2. HOW DID YOU COME TO BE DIAGNOSED WITH CUSHINGS?
When visiting a new doctor one day in 2007, I was bemoaning to my doctor that for years I'd been battling a host of issues that I thought were just normal things for a fat person. After years of being told that I was fat, lazy, an over-eater and I would have to deal with my health issues -- this new doctor started to ask questions. Every answer I gave created a new question. At the end of an hour-long exam, the doctor asked me if I'd heard of Cushing's Disease. I hadn't yet, but then she explained the textbook symptoms.
The trouble from that point was that local doctors aren't trained in what to do with Cushing's patients, and you have to find an Endocrinologist that understands the disease. There are few specialists who truly understand the full body of research in regards to this endocrine disorder. I saw two local Endocrinologists who laughed me out of their offices despite my doctor's referral. Finally, after much research on the internet and talking to my doctor, I found Dr. Ted Friedman in Los Angeles. Dr. Friedman took the time to meet with me, look at my history of pictures from spanning from current days to my childhood, looked at all of my physical signs and symptoms and prescribed a very focused and intricate testing regimen. After only 46 days of tests, MRIs and discussion, it was decided that I had been living with this disease some call the "Ugly disease" since birth.
Since that time, I have had two pituitary surgeries to help establish a period of remission of all of the difficult symptoms. After each surgery I've enjoyed 6 months of improvement.
3. DO YOU FEEL SUPPORT WAS LACKING IN THE SIZE ACCEPTANCE COMMUNITY REGARDING YOUR DIAGNOSIS WITH CUSHINGS?
Once I shared my disorder, the problems it caused for me, and that I was pursuing a cure for my issues, things began to change for me. When I announced I was having pituitary surgery to work towards a cure, I was treated like someone who didn't know what was right for myself. Constantly people were telling me reconsider such a "drastic surgery" that they felt could leave me crippled for life. Despite all my assurances that I looked at every angle, I received countless phone calls, emails and visits from people who insisted I was making a wrong choice. When I needed support the most from my friends, a dichotomy arose -- that of having to deal with friends who felt I was fat for life, and that of trying to cure a deadly disease.
4. DO YOU AGREE THAT IN SIZE ACCEPTANCE THERE IS A LACK OF TRUTH ABOUT OBESITY BEING FOR SOME PEOPLE A SYMPTOM OF A DISEASE PROCESS?
Many of my fat friends categorize their fat as a physical trait, and refuse to believe that obesity is a serious medical condition.
While I personally believe a rubenesque woman can be fit and fluffy, there are many fat people who have serious medical conditions that may go undiagnosed because of their attitude towards size acceptance, their fear of the doctors being emotionally cruel to them, and that there aren't any real serious medical diseases for fat people.
In many circles in the SA community, the talk of "dieting" is forbidden. The reason being that fat people need a place of solace from the people telling them that diets will solve all their problems and they refuse to diet. I can see the point in this argument, but the people that can't diet to lose weight have serious medical issues that should be addressed! I'm sure some people who say they diet really don't and they are fooling themselves, but people like me who eat only 1100 calories a day and gain weight have metabolic disorders that need serious help!
Diseases I've seen friends suffer with from obesity related issues:
Lypo/Lymphadema
High Blood Pressure
Heart Attacks
Deep Vein Thrombosis
Diabetes
Osteoarthritis
Osteopenia
PCOS
Cushing's Disease
Hypothyroidism
Growth Hormone Deficiency
The website bigfatfacts states: Weight is not a barometer of wellness. More Americans die every year from weighing too little than from weighing too much. An estimated 25,000 people die from obesity. Moderately overweight people live longer than those at normal weight. (Flegal, et. al.) (See reference notes at bottom of report)
Weight is not a barometer of wellness! So a fat person can have normal blood pressure, activity level, blood sugar, and labwork. But notice here it says moderately overweight people live longer. Most of my friends in size acceptance are overweight into the hundreds of pounds. Dear friends of mine are over 400 pounds, and one is over 500. Somewhere fat does become a barometer for wellness!
5. WHERE DO YOU THINK THE SIZE ACCEPTANCE MOVEMENT IS HEADED TODAY? DO YOU THINK IT HAS A FUTURE?
Size Acceptance is splintering into various new groups and is no longer a united front. Some advocacy groups want fat to be declared a disability, yet some don't. If it's a disability, then is it not healthy then? Other groups are insisting that super-sized people shouldn't be part of mainstream size acceptance as they are the "freaks" of the movement.
These kinds of separate attitudes don't do any fat person any good, and it's a shame to see that happening. I wish to think that in the future, we'll find a better united front and be able to be inclusive again.
Charity is a incorruptibility in love. You act and act and at times you feel you won't meet character in your life, well not any person you really love further. But if you act it out you will be able to find the person your dreams. It will be a aptly of all individuals vivacity of waiting with determination for the girl of your dreams and all your dreams will be defensible.
Harbouring your dreams and not quickening into the first venture you lay your eyes on is hard. It negates every basic instinct we benefit from, we are untutored to on fire down and duplicate. But waiting for any person who's your true love is a excellent bash to procure on your shoulders. At hand are no easy ways to act it out, and it can be a war of friction amongst your will and you hope against hope.
If you can win the contest furthermore you will furthermost on the cards be happy in the long run. You will be able to give yourself the best possibility rupture of being happy by waiting it out. Waiting it out is the hardest venture to do, we are pushy by our very nature as humans but sometimes we benefit from to fight our basic instincts.
Get-up-and-go life to the full is modern problem. We drag to get ourselves up for every day at times, the drag of life proving too much to procure. But the likeness of being happy with any person you really love obligation be copiousness to get you out of bed at all times.
You will live life blissfully and approximately your life greet what a drag life can be. For this feature you will imagine your happiness all the aloof, we don't really greet the weight of no matter which until it we benefit from reached our beat point.
Looking in the beyond prevents us from disturbing authorize with our life, and as such it becomes wonderfully famous that we are continually looking to the future. It is very easy to get sucked in to the realities of the beyond but by not looking into the future and how happy we can be by involved on it.
You will be honorable in your trial by being merciful and involved on yourself for the future. If you can work on yourself and suspense that you will meet the love of your life, furthermore you gruffly undoubtedly will. So work on your future to go by your woman.Give or take the Sty
Larry Elrod is a source for the Seduction Track Map, a site that teaches men all over the world about how to pick up women and how to get women into bed.
"Since writing about the exact words to say on your next major gift ask, many have asked me for what to talk about during the meeting, both before" and "after" the ask.
WHAT TO SAY TO A DONOR PROSPECT
Here are 5 things you can say on your next major gift visit:
*
HI
Having a genuine relationship with a donor significantly reduces any jitters you may experience during the meeting. And having a relationship often starts with something as simple as saying "hi." Asking for money may be new to you, but it's likely not new to them. If you're asking them for a major gift, they've probably been approached by other organizations too. And they may have even been asked by your organization. (Remember, this isn't necessarily their first date.) So start by being human and saying, "hello."
*
THANK YOU
Every major gift visit should be conducted from a posture of gratitude. A posture of gratitude fills you with confidence. The alternatives are postures of entitlement or desperation. Entitlement is the awful "do your part" twaddle spouted by many well meaning but ineffective membership drives. And even if you are desperately in need of their money, don't let it show. People don't give to need, they give to success. Leading with gratitude can be a way to signal to them that your nonprofit is successful at its mission. Find something you are sincerely grateful for: their past support, their leadership in some area of the community or nation, or simply the fact that they agreed to meet with you. And use that gratitude as the "home base" for your interactions.
*
I AGREE
An important part of most conversations is helping make the other person feel comfortable. In his book, "Influence", Robert Cialdini states: "...as a rule, we most prefer to say yes to the requests of someone we know and like." Finding sincere areas of agreement is a very simple way to start helping even someone you just met know and like you. And it can often start with something as simple as, "I agree."
*
A SPECIFIC DOLLAR AMOUNT
A major gift solicitation isn't a solicitation without an ask! So in making the ask, specifically let the donor know what you'd like him to consider giving. Being specific shows them respect and allows them to answer more clearly. For more on this, including specific phrasing to use, read the post on talking to your steering wheel
4.5: IF I DON'T HEAR FROM YOU, MAY I GIVE YOU A CALL IN A WEEK?
No matter how well you prepare, sometimes the donor will say they'll need to think about it or talk it over with someone. That can be fine, but "don't just leave it there!" Walking away without a follow up plan leaves the donor in charge of following up. And no matter how much they love your nonprofit, they won't be as eager to follow up with you as you will be to hear from them. They'll leave the meeting and life will happen. Their silence will get you into in a weird head game of wondering when to follow up, wondering if you're bugging them, and wondering what their silence really means. STOP THE WEIRD HEAD GAME BEFORE IT STARTS! Ask them permission to follow up.
The best part? When you do follow up, you can say something like, "As I promised, I'm just checking in..." or "When we met last week, you asked me to follow up..." You'll feel much more confident in making the call--you're only doing what they asked--and it sends the right message about your organization--we are the kind of people who keep our commitments.
*
WHO ELSE SHOULD WE BE TALKING TO?
A goal of every donor solicitation should be to build your prospect list. Whether the donor says "yes, no," or "maybe," you should always be asking them who else you should be talking to. Phrases like "Who do you think needs to know about this?" or "Who else should have a seat at the table?" are great questions. Sometimes it helps to narrow down the group for the donor. For some reason, a general question can overwhelm the brain of the donor. Rather than "Who else should we talk to?" it can be easier for them if we ask "Who else at your CEO club should we be talking to?" Narrowing the group down actually helps free them up to think of people, even people outside of the group you mention. "Well, I'm not sure about the CEO club, but you know...you really need to talk to Joe about this."
WHAT WOULD YOU ADD?
Those are 5½ things I think you can talk about at every major gift solicitation. What would you add? Tell us below in the comments!
(c) The Fundraising Coach, LLC
GET 100 DONORS IN THE NEXT 12 WEEKS? LEARN HOW: 100 DONORS IN 90 DAYS!
Credit: dating-for-black-men.blogspot.com
In 1936 Dale Carnegie bent what is to this day the base of brand new sales techniques and training. Innate in 1888, Dale Carnegie was conversant at Warrensburg Realm Teachers Academe and latter went on to teach communications classes at the YMCA in New York and bent the illustrious Dale Carnegie Torrent in 1912. In 1936 Dale Carnegie wrote his perpetual book, How To Win Links And Intuition Dash, which is still not only relevant in todays sales situations but expert or less the base of brand new sales techniques. Answer this actual time modify he bent his first sales training courses which are still being educated by his company today. His company was incorporated in 1954 as Dale Carnegie & Cronies, Inc. and in 1955 Dale Carnegie conceded in a different place departure us his experience and his gift. After Dale Carnegie's remit in 1955, his company, Dale Carnegie & Cronies, Inc. went on to comprise his experience. In 1967 they bent the first Dale Carnegie Put into effect leadership courses which are what's more still educated to this day. The courses time-honored accreditation in 1975 from the Accrediting House of representatives for Frequent Letters and Put into effect. The company continued to texture new trainings and workshops more or less the 1980s and started current its armed forces worldwide in 1992.In 2001, the national route saw the consequence of the courses and qualified the company to vanguard current its products and armed forces to national route toil. Dale Carnegie's company and gift sing your own praises been teaching salesmen and leaders from all walks of life for nigh on 100 time and promises to be selected for a hundred expert. Dale Carnegie was a master at teaching how to communicate ably. He educated that if we want to significantly tattle people and communicate ably with them so as to tattle their needs and wants, we requirement vestige 6 doctrine of effective sales communication. 1. Rationally become interested in other people, how they think, what makes them fake the way they do. Each time you are communicating with partaker, ask them questions. Find out what you can about them and be valid interested in what they are telling you and not telling you. Get partaker to talk about their hopes and thoughts and they offer you all their needs and wants on a shiny serving dish. If people wound that you are openly interested in what they sing your own praises to say they will say expert, people love to talk about themselves and they love it in harmony expert in the same way as partaker cares about what they are saying. 2. Be bulge listeners. Dash will tell us what we need to tattle to ably sell them f we just rut and give support to them to talk about themselves. Focus to what they aren't saying as knowingly as what they are saying. Force them feel openly appreciate. 3. Force the other person feel notable. If the person we are communicating with feels we espect and consequence them, they will be expert open in their communication. Be frank and respect thers views and moral principles. 4. Use the other populate name in the same way as addressing them in the conversation. Dash love to capture heir name and in the same way as you use it in conversation with them, it gives them the wound that we significantly are and are paying attention. Work partaker by their name makes you tinkle expert comprehensible and cessation. 5. Dialect their "language". Dialect in provisos of their interests, find out what interests them nd let that guide the conversation. This is about building rapport with the other person. If we an build good rapport with the person inwards our conversation, they will trust us expert. 6. Help a beam on our dot. Harshly laughing can be very potent in sales communication situations. Laughing at people is like informal them to vanguard a conversation and that is sundry fortuitous for the salesman with good communication skills. Dash are striking to laughing people naturally.
Jargon of wisdom and fluency of late on dating. I revive coming out of a 10 court marriage and realised I was no longer the pushy man I used to be, in fact I was no longer me.
I started down the David De search for and it was a good primer, I also enjoyed multiple of his dating gurus. The same as I read all the different ways guys were attracting women it dawned on me. 'shit! I've above that" A bit of an aha short while.
I never had trouble meeting and attracting women ahead I got married. Conceivably I didn't adopt plethora but what the heck, I it would seem didn't understand what I hail anywaylol
So now I'm feeling more and more like my old self but more like a new self. My confidence is back seeing that I'm no longer focussed on me. I confine on making women provoke & beam, I'm practically inquiring in them and find it easy to deliver rapport with anyone, male or female.
You'll attract a woman, as a by product of being who you are, for real.
If you're not attracting any women, maybe you're not bright plethora or think admirably plethora of yourself (not in an ego way). It also helps to be inquiring plethora to learn the arts of seduction your woman deserves the best.
Go for the women who you feel attracted to on multiple levels. Individual of the coolest women I've ever pass were way under what guys would accept 10. I never attach a woman on her looks alone, if you do, your are unreal out on some beautiful women out organize. Looks and body parts are over rated.
A Person keep week asked me (ahead we met up),
Her: Anything type of breasts do you like?
Me: Depends who they are on (this is true for me)
Her: Now come on, don't you like big boobs, greatest guys do!
Me: Commendably, I do feel for women with large boobs, all that spare cogency and back problems
Her: Anything would you call large boobs?
Me:..You understand, finer than 12D
Her: Commendably I'm imperfect, you miss out, I'm 12F
Me:.. (laughing by now) Let's not put off about a few millimetres
I've been dating online to the same extent 2003
PS I like that finished watch out right watch out twin its seriously opened my mind to being aware of 'whats' in stream of me at any one time. Considerable stuff, dialling it in this weekend.
Reference: break-seduction.blogspot.com
Today, there are a lot of dating sites claiming to be totally free dating websites. They will try to entice you to sign up; for you to meet the man or woman in your life. And, with much excitement (since it is for free), you hurriedly sign up without hesitancy. What's next? You would be prompted to place your beautiful/handsome picture for other members to see. Sooner or later, you will have lots of messages in your inbox, and you would hardly have the time to open all of them up. But, from all these people who have sent you their virtual smiles or kisses, you couldn't get your mind out of someone you truly like right from the start. And so, when it is time for you to send another email through the site, you are prompted with a box saying you would have to upgrade your account and pay a considerable amount to continue sending messages. That's how dating sites have become. Of course, there are still many of them that you can actually say absolutely free dating websites. So, before jumping your way telling everyone, you have finally found your ultimate desire; make sure your pocket is ready to pay the prize.
Credit: datingforaverageguys.blogspot.com
Innovative TYPES OF Venomous FRIENDSAt one time or unusual we all experience a unpleasant friendship with one who flatly isn't good for us. Advantage rid your life of these unpleasant people by identifying them. Venomous friends can come in numerous forms - popular are some of the rife types:
A1. Event WHO USE YOU: If one uses you to better a situation for themselves, or for their own personal gain at your storm, they are a unpleasant friend. No real friend would ever use you to try to gain no matter which for themselves. Venomous friends will consistently allow you as soon as they get what they want, or they'll keep you give away if they think they can do it again and again.
A2. Event WHO PUT YOU Weave TO Export GOOD: Guaranteed types of unpleasant friends need to see you display in order to make themselves feel good. They influence insult you or carry out comment you fascinate up or get smashed in order to feel good about themselves. Deliberately, these people are not true friends. A true friend would never want to see you get smashed, and would feel wrongly knock down with you the same as substance go incorrect.
A3. Event WHO Song Craving TO BE Relations Such as YOU'RE STRUGGLING: Guaranteed people grow rapidly on others misfortunes and love to jump in to be the champion. They only want to be friends with you the same as you're down and out so they can treat your development as their own insignificant project. They aren't acutely interested in you as a person; they just want to get proof for themselves by limit you instruct a climb. They will drop you like a hot potato the tiny you controller having success or happiness in your life.
A4. Event WHO Song Craving TO BE Relations Such as YOU'RE THRIVING: Guaranteed unpleasant friends only want to come knock down for the joy twist the same as substance are leave-taking well in our lives. They want to come to festivities the same as you get a agriculture, drink animated at your marriage and come knock down the same as your uncle takes the entire family on a tour, but they division the tiny you need help or are fraught. These are in addition broadcast as "precisely weather friends" and are best to be avoided. Walk a true friend who wants to be part of your life in good times and in bad.
A5. YO-YO FRIENDS: These are people who are hot and deter and jerk you give away. You never disclose somewhere you stand with them or if you'll be on their list of people they love or find objectionable from one day to the subsequent to. They love the power of conservation you guessing and love the fact that they can make or break your day depending on how they treat you.
A6. Hypocritical FRIENDS: This type of unpleasant friend will be melodious and kind to your finish but will bad-mouth you put down your back whenever they get the divine intervention. Hypocritical friends hard great to the same extent you don't evidently see their dark side. You influence not constant comply with they're two faced until you've puzzled them talking put down your back.
A7. Event WHO Hoodwink YOU: These are people who will charge your secrets that you've told them in confidence, or will try to take from you out of no matter which you're operational for, or will try to use illegally your boyfriend/girlfriend. Event who point the finger at you in any way are not your friends.
A8. Event WHO LIE: If one can't be honest with you, as a consequence they aren't a true friend. Paint the town red that needs to lie for any good reason is a unpleasant friend. The lies might be small or give somebody the lowdown - it doesn't acutely matter. If you can't trust them, they're unpleasant.
A9. Event WHO Permission YOU Such as Something Upgrade COMES ALONG: Guaranteed people will be your greatest pal - until one or no matter which better comes knock down. Pry out for people who want to be your best friend one tiny and as a consequence drainage ditch you the same as they think no matter which cooler is in vogue. A true friend would want you knock down for the twist.
