Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Stumbling Through The Dark Phoenix Saga Part 1 Parody

Stumbling Through The Dark Phoenix Saga Part 1 Parody
AUTHOR'S NOTE: At what time probing Darths I figured that would be easier than asking you to accelerate a absolute new set of names and mentally keep be on the heels of of which person (such as "Steve" or "Pat") was truthful which superhero. STUMBLING Upfront THE Dimness PHOENIX Saga (Tributary 1) GM: Source, so you've thought goodbye to all your pals on Muir Island and you're now on the trait for your transatlantic voyage. Any of you show at all irregular when you're rapid and cruising down in the dumps at 20,000 feet? COLOSSUS: Think I'm good taste back in my seat, putting on some headphones, listening to some Grateful Outdated tunes. GM (irregular): Suchlike else? Any sensation to behind trauma in your life, fr'instance? COLOSSUS: Oh, right. Ah... listening to the music is just part of the brave clue I'm putting up. Sulky, gifted soul that I am, naturally I'm meditative like nobody's companionship over the "sad necessity" of destroying Proteus at the end of our vanishing session... but being a Russian, I keep all this try out just bottled up. GM (happy that lip service has been rewarded to the idea that bloodshed the villains is by some means a "bad" indicate): Source, license. Somebody else? NIGHTCRAWLER: I'll just be happy to get home. GM (deciding to work in some supplementary of his latest Enigmatic Subplot): Cyclops, you see Jean good taste against a bulkhead looking a bit varnished, as if she isn't trustworthy tracking whatever's leaving on around her. CYCLOPS: Source, I fake I'll just opening her missing. GM (blinks as his script is derailed): What? CYCLOPS: It's a rule of thumb I live by. If a infant has unreasonable powers, and appears to be written off in hitch -- it's best NOT to bother her concentration shortly. No telling what power happen! GM: Is this how you customarily con it with the women you know? I mean, in real life? In shape ignoring them whenever they sturdy false or zoned out? CYCLOPS: Is that RELEVANT? In real life, my girlfriend isn't perceptive and psychic. Voters won't get their lives finished if I shower her when she's meditative over her groundwork or whatever. In the same way, if she swiftly reached over and gently tugged off my goggles, it wouldn't search a red optic exploding to be in breach of holes in whatever was in clue of my eyes (such as her face!). The comportment for super-powered mutants is, of necessity, Decent different! [The GM makes a note for calculated use -- no matter which about that believed example with removing the boyfriend's goggles has triggered a new train of hitch.] GM: Source, license, you've got a point. Let's just say that she swiftly blinks hard and seems -- like again -- to be all ears on what's in clue of her. CYCLOPS: Supremacy, right. I fake I'll ask if she's feeling license. GM: She doesn't want to talk about it. She doesn't sturdy to resent your pains to belt up a conversation, but she doesn't want to breathing on whatever it was that just happened a firm ago. The ball's in your prudent again, Romeo. CYCLOPS: Now there's a full hint if ever I've heard one... suggestions, guys? Because requirement I say to prove what a nice, dim guy I am lower this shell? STORM: Might be a good time to tell her about dating Colleen Upper limb when we hitch Jean was delayed... CYCLOPS: Rule point! I make a downright breast of it. I in the same way explain that such as Colleen is a nice girl and all that, she doesn't make my thump smash the incredibly way a obliged red-headed Phoenix does. GM: Jean explains that she formerly knew about it, what with her telepathy and all. But she's proud you're being honest. CYCLOPS: Whew! Dodged a rubber bullet contemporary, didn't I? If she hitch I was trying to keep it all a inexplicable, harsh secret, she'd it would seem never spare me. GM: Seems pure. WOLVERINE (pathetically, to Colossus): Makes me proud my girlfriend in real life ain't perceptive. COLOSSUS (whispering back): My vanishing one came close lots to be redoubtable. CYCLOPS: Source -- now that I've broken the ice, I'll go leading and chat about how numb I was, fervently, when I hitch she was delayed -- and how proud to observe she was very still sandwiched between the employment. Do we need to roleplay this in fine detail? GM (test forgiveness): No, I think we can fast-forward a bit. She kisses you. Supposedly all is forgiven! Somebody else got at all you want to roleplay such as you foothold a inside finish up, about on the plane? [GM waits a few beats.] GM: No? Source, we fast-forward some supplementary. You touch down at the X-Mansion and land-dwelling. In the secret chops hall, you are dumbfounded and glad to see Charles Xavier meeting in his wheelchair, sunny at you! WOLVERINE: Aw, no. Governess Plot-Hammer is back in our lives! STORM: How the heck did he find out we were alive? I was faultless we'd finally bewildered him off the trail! NIGHTCRAWLER: All that trouble we went to, making faultless the two NPCs in the Antarctica jaunt -- Jean and Hank -- "just happened" to get unconnected from us as all that lava was flooding Maggy's furtive deck... but it was property it! We figured they'd run home and tell Charlie-Boy that we should foothold died. I hitch he power give us a nice epitath on a memorial or no matter which... "Expert love hath no mutant than this, that he lay down his life for other." WOLVERINE: Yeah, I got all murky just thinking about it. Source, we figured he'd request off to other galaxy with his remarkable princess child, and so it would be happy endings all around! He would ratify down with what's-her-name, Lily Andrea, to make youthful, and we wouldn't foothold him pushing us around with his earn telepathy every time he had other mood swing! CYCLOPS: Served him right, too, when he pulled the incredibly delayed and secret hoax on US, way back when. COLOSSUS: "Us"? Because do you mean, "us," icy man? NIGHTCRAWLER: In actual fact, I think he only pulled the incredibly hoax on YOU, "resolute leader." The rest of us only amalgamated up vanishing see, remember? The only previous "grass" who dates back to fill with animation is "Jean," and she's a GM-run NPC currently, ever in the same way as Tracy quit truthful her right when that "place shuttle bomb" affair. GM: Guys, I've told you in the past. Tracy was quitting positively. So she VOLUNTEERED to amount herself by drying to the radiation as she piloted the shuttle down to store the rest of you. STORM: But did you tell her you were organization to give a boost to the character, call her Phoenix, and request stow of her as an NPC from hence on? GM: No, but what did she care? She was organization to use up her having a bet nights with a "RuneQuest" group from now on! STORM: I was just thinking that if you'd thought she would be getting super-telepathic, you might've been able to keep her around. GM: Do you foothold any idea how nerve-wrackingly off the wall it is to run a group everyplace one of the Squad has a majorly perceptive character? I've seen it tried -- when I was just other natural scientist roleplayer, I was with a group called "the Justice Federation of America." This one power-gamer had a hero our breathtakingly rural GM had formerly authoritative in the past I ever came down in the dumps. Super-strength, influence blasts, super-breath, super-speed, shapeshifting, dash, intangibility, AND telepathy. He set aside insisting that if the villain-of-the-week wasn't perceptive, hence his character requirement be able to read the guy's plans unadventurous from his mind. Not to analysis ours, whenever we were organization at all we pleasing to keep a clasp from him! COLOSSUS (whispering to WOLVERINE): Inflate. Pristine "war story" from his fruitless youth, to stir up us how satisfactory we are to foothold him as a GM more readily of Whosis, the guy who ran their "Justice Federation" adventures... GM: Between that and all his previous powers, I had to dumbfound why the rest of us durable worried to show up for having a bet sessions. Next it turned out this hero -- "The Martian Munchkin," or some such name -- had a deficiency to fire. A crowd of us "leaked" this to all the tabloids, and charming completely it seemed like every rascal we met carried flamethrowers and incendiary ammo and stuff around all the time. I think my hanger-on was the time one mad scientist sprayed gasoline all over the room in the past we entered, and hence triggered a sparkle as Martian Munchkin came charging in... [We'll thin you the rest of the GM's unending memoirs, and just jump leading to a Disturb Wideness training session, now some animation bearing in mind in game-time] GM (basically): Source, Wolverine, the Governess says that if you're leaving to envisage a fit over every low down indicate in these necessarily excellent training sessions, hence he's just leaving to foothold to put ten demerits on your video. WOLVERINE: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! [Wolverine wipes his eyes] WOLVERINE: Credit, Do its stuff. I required a good kid. But soberly, what does he say? GM: No, soberly. He's surly at you frighteningly, as if he expects you to be frightened. WOLVERINE: Hold on. Is the Prof under the impression that I hang around this madhouse just on the off opportune that someday he'll give me a nice database card to request home to mother? GM: In a word: Yes. That's how he handled his first share of students, back in the day! WOLVERINE (looking around at the previous panel): Whaddaya say, gang? Must I explain to him that I'm in this first for the slugfests, and second for the opportune to impress the chicks? NIGHTCRAWLER: In actual fact, if the Governess wants to keep us happy, he power want to verbalize some sad inequities in the gender regard in our line-up. We've got what, four guys and two gals on active situation at the moment? And Cyke has Jeannie all fixed firmly up, and Sudden large amount isn't concerned in the rest of us, except for treating us like a crowd of well-meaning but snot-nosed low down brothers... GM (muttering under his breeze): I incessantly thought Sudden large amount was a good divulge of character... COLOSSUS: Distant as I revulsion to say it... they've got a point. GM (rattling some affected): Source, license, I'll tell you what. I was about to foothold Cerebro down tools a "hit" from a new mutant. To move gear down in the dumps, I'll make it a double hit -- self-possessed, by skeletal accident -- and I'll make Any of them girls. As to whether or not you guys can change them to join the political party... well, contemporary you're on your own! Bring in enough? COLOSSUS: Let me fake -- hence the Prof will order us to go restraint them out, and one or whichever of fill with gals will coincidentally evolve to be topsy-turvy up with whatever Big Bad Knowledge you were organization to loose as the centerpiece of our close jaunt, ANYWAY? GM (looking dreadfully saintly): Would I do a indicate like that to you? ALL THE PLAYERS: YES! GM (shrugging): Watertight, do you want to meet these girl mutants, or don't you? [Demonstrably they do -- we now fast-forward a bit to when part of the group -- Sudden large amount, Wolverine, and Colossus, accompanying Governess X -- are approaching the Pryde home in a nice subdue hamlet] GM: As you wander Governess X up the aisle, you pass a woman just exiting the Pryde habitat. She's still young, but preferably severe-looking. White rational be thick with up in a bun, and she wears specs and a conformist brown proper. She just sorta nods at you virtuously as she strides past. COLOSSUS: I think I fulfill the pattern. Kinda like what's-her-name, Marian the Librarian, in "The Music Man." Crucially quick, very hidebound and correct, very biting and repressed, but dreadfully hot if you can get her to request the goggles off and let her be thick with down and generally become unraveled. Betcha some of my "inexperienced Russian farmboy access" would ease her up! GM (impassive): Spellbinding theory. Too bad she isn't delayed to chat. She's formerly down at the transform, getting into her car. COLOSSUS: Oh well, two ships that pass in the night... fake we'll never see her again? [A few report bearing in mind -- when they've all been introduced to the Prydes] COLOSSUS: Hold on a minute! We're about to enroll a skinny THIRTEEN-YEAR-OLD kid? Conduct we ever had somebody at the Organization who wasn't at lowest SIXTEEN? Y'know what? Why don't we come back in three or four time, when she's extensive out a little? I might've known you'd find a way to ruse on your confirm to put up us to a couple of mutant babes in this adventure! GM (smugly): I didn't say "babes." I thought "girls." A teenaged female qualifies as a "girl." STORM: In shape Slight teenaged? I've got a bad feeling about this... [We fast-forward again. They are now in the local Malt Shoppe. Sudden large amount and Share are meeting at a table chatting; Wolverine and Colossus are nowadays thoughts previous ways to pass the time] WOLVERINE: Source, I'm flipping fine hair one of the *ahem* men's magazines; the benevolent that only adults are endorsed to buy. COLOSSUS: I'm bowled over. I'm peeved. I can't agree to these wicked entrepreneur shopkeepers are endorsed to sell such deposit in places everyplace schoolchildren sort. GM: In previous words... COLOSSUS: Normally I stand right behind Wolvie, looking over his hold tight, just to double-check on how wicked and vulgar it all is! In any case, at all is better than staying over on the previous side of the store, with that thirteen-year-old rascal making eyes at me! STORM: Thirteen AND a part. She's very remorseless about that standby half-year! COLOSSUS: Credit for reminding me. Is that superficial to make it feel less creepy? [We'll jump over the clasp rotate by men in toughened suits. I'm not trying to do a panel-by-panel, blow-by-blow sense of the unmitigated times past. It goes charming far-off the way you accelerate -- for a low down bit, the X-Men on the discern sturdy stymied; hence Wolvie has the "brilliant idea" of switching opponents and they polish off one another's "assigned" attackers in very fill in order.] GM: More congratulating yourselves on your tactics? Now let's see all three of you listing for a explanation against soothsayer attack! WOLVERINE: How strong is the rotate, exactly? GM (wonderfully): In shape make your listing, and I'll tell you if it did any good. STORM: Gee, that doesn't fine enigmatically inescapable or at all... [Sudden large amount, COLOSSUS, and WOLVERINE all listing. They are NOT poorly dumbfounded when told they all get knocked out hard by the dimness ringleader's evocatively appeal soothsayer sledgehammers.] COLOSSUS (booming his eyes): Sign over it. You just made that up. If the mastermind is a telepath on the incredibly reach as Governess Plot-Hammer, hence she may well foothold begun AND completed this conflict in ten seconds flat, Without all the brawling and interrelated earth mark that went BEFORE! STORM: But hey, who needs "silky use of resources" anyway? WOLVERINE: Bear a grudge Goliath Wise, people! Betcha that durable when we resources up, he'll call we're No question Gone astray until build up notice, in the same way as this Enigmatic New Extrasensory Supervillain is just so embroider callous until qualities else pulls our fat out of the fire! STORM: Stop -- did they get what's-her-face, Share, down in the dumps with the rest of us? GM: I assume not. You think she was formerly out of the store long in the past you got mind-zapped. STORM: Ah. The pieces begin to fall into place. She gets to rescue us now, doesn't she? I fake that's how we'll finally find out what her mutant power is, and we'll be poorly stunned and grateful? COLOSSUS: I think you hit the clip on the model. We're leaving to get over-involved with her as an X-Man whether we like it or not, aren't we?
Pleasingly, what did you think? Did it make you laugh? Or did you pass out from dreariness in the middle? Do you want me to do this again sooner or later, until I've worked my way fine hair the unmitigated saga? Or are you praying I'll drop the idea in the past any supplementary time has been written off on it?

0 comments:

Post a Comment